“Grind Culture” and Burn Out

Cassie:  Welcome to “The Real Life Show: Living with a Chronic Illness.” We are your hosts, Cassie and Chelsea. I’m Cassie, a single mom living with a chronic illness who is extremely passionate about living a full and happy life.

Chelsea:  And, I’m Chelsea, a mindset coach that has a passion for helping people learn to put themselves first and be the best version of themselves each and every day.

Cassie:  We came together to create Spoonies Unite, an uplifting community that offers resources, guidance and support so you can live your best life while giving you the space to be yourself, be heard, and feel understood. We hope that by providing education from experts, we help spoonies and their loved ones thrive.

Chelsea:  This show is not only for those who live with a chronic illness, but their friends, family, spouses, and just anyone else existing on the Earth.

Our goal is to normalizing having a chronic illness by sharing the real stories with real people and show the world how relatable those everyday struggles can be. There’s a little something in here for everyone.

Cassie:  And, of course, thank you to our patrons, for your continued support making this possible. If you love our show and want to get some extra goodies, go to patreon.com/therealspooniesunite. Enjoy the show.

Chelsea:  Hello, everyone. And, welcome to today’s episode of “The Real Life Show: Living with a Chronic Illness.” Today, Cassie and I are just chatting, the two of us. And, we’re talking about grind culture, hustle culture, be busy culture, do all the things that our society kind of have.

Cassie:  Sleep when you die culture.

Chelsea:  Yeah. When you die, I hate that one. I can sleep when I’m dead. No, I would like to sleep right now. Thank you very much.

Cassie:  Yeah.

Chelsea:  So, this is something that is near and dear to our hearts. This is something that I personally struggle with a lot. And, actually, it’s really funny that we’re recording this episode today because I have a story that I will share in a moment that happened earlier today. And, it’s kind of things to Cassie that happened, but anyways.

And, the way this culture portrays us in our society as a whole, it puts a lot of pressure on everyone to do all the things and work really, really hard. But then, when you have a chronic illness and you have maybe a little bit more limited energy than you would if you’re a “normal person,” no one’s normal we all have limited energy, but it makes things a lot harder when you’re like, “I can only give so much” because that society is like, “No, you have to do all the things.”

So, yeah, is there anything you want to say Cassie before we just dive right in and I tell my story?

Cassie:  Oh, my god. Well, I think I’d just say firstly, if you are someone listening who has a chronic illness or limited amounts of energy for whatever reason, I don’t know, you really need to think about this whole grind culture thing. And, I am kind of guilty of it too.

I don’t think I’m quite as bad as Chelsea about it, but I do definitely try to do all the things and I do feel like my sister-in-law whose name is also Cassie is kind of one of the people who’s like, “Stop doing all the things. You’re trying to do all the things.” And then, she’s sort of my little devil’s advocate where I’m like, “Oh, shit, am I? Am I doing all the things?” But, I’m not quite as bad as Chelsea about it mostly because my body will shut me down when I am doing all the things.

So, this is a good topic to talk about. And, yeah, Chelsea, tell us, you go.

Chelsea:  So, basically you all if you don’t know me very well, I like to do a lot. I am kind of a workaholic in some ways. Part of that is because I absolutely love what I do. And so, when you love what you do, it becomes really fun. I enjoy getting on and recording podcasts. I like being on social media interacting with all of you. I love all that stuff. But, I do tend to keep myself busy.

When I was in college, I had multiple jobs. When I was in grad school, I had five different jobs while being a full-time grad student. And, even now that I’m done with school, Cassie and I have this business. I have my own business and I teach Pilates, help run that studio, and I teach bar. I have a very full schedule. I pride myself in my time management skills, but I am kind of someone where it’s like, “Oh, I have 30 minutes, what can I get done?” That’s my first thought is “Okay, 30 minutes are here, what can I get accomplished in these 30 minutes?” instead of “Oh, I have 30 minutes, let me just rest. Can I just sit here for 30 minutes?”

And so, it’s something I’ve been working a lot on of placing boundaries and I’m only going to do so much. I’m only working so much. So many things I can put on my to-do list in a day and then allowing myself to rest more and working through the mindset stuff. And, honestly, that mindset of you have to do more, you have to do more, you have to do more is what I’ve coached myself through, still coach myself through, and I like to coach others through. So, it is a mindset drama thing. But, it’s interesting because it’s my story. There’s this bodywork individual who is amazing. Cassie goes to her and then she’s like, “Chelsea, you have to try it.”

And so, I did, and I actually had my first session with her the day that we’re recording this. And, she’s incredible. So, it’s physical bodywork but it’s also very energetic bodywork. And so, she’s doing her thing–

Cassie:  She kind of calls it intuitive bodywork.

Chelsea:  Yes. But, I was wondering how to describe it.

Cassie:  Yeah, that’s sort of how. Shout out to Brenda. She’s also a trained acupuncturist and she does a lot of lymphatic drainage, lymphatic massage. She actually is trained in a craniosacral. She does a lot of different stuff but all of that has ended up kind of where now what she calls is more intuitive bodywork. So, she really doesn’t just stick to one of those things. She does to you what she’s called to, what your body is telling her essentially. It’s crazy amazing shit. Okay, keep going.

Chelsea:  I want to make sure that people know this is the first time I’ve met Brenda. I don’t know how much Cassie had told Brenda about me, probably just that we were working on this project together, this business.

Cassie:  Yes.

Chelsea:  She knows nothing about me as a person or how–

Cassie:  No.

Chelsea:  Literally nothing. I didn’t tell her anything about what I do. She knows I taught Pilates but that was pretty much it.

Cassie:  And, I didn’t tell her stuff either.

Chelsea:  Yeah. So, she doesn’t know anything about me. She’s working on me and she gets this spot in my mid-back. It’s kind of a little bit below my shoulder blades but also kind of a little bit lower. And, she was like, “Oh, this is tight, this is a bit okay.” And, I was like, “Yeah, I’ve had issues with that spot off and on for kind of as long as I can remember. It’s pretty common for that spot in my back to get tight on me.” She’s like, “Okay, interesting.” And, she’s like, “What muscle is it?” And, I’m like, “I don’t know.” People told me different things throughout my life, and I’ve gotten massages or had other instructors or trainers look at it. They’re like, “Oh, it’s this or this.”

And, anyways, she was like, “Well, when I put my hand on it, the message I get is that there’s this generational pattern in your family of basically–” oh how did she describe it? I sent it to you in a text message, Cassie, so I’m going to go back and repeat it because I can’t remember.

Cassie:  Yeah, do it.

Chelsea:  Where’s that message? We text a lot.

Cassie:  I know. Whenever I’m looking for something–

Chelsea:  That wasn’t that long ago.

Cassie:  From last time, okay, yeah, I have to always scroll back because yeah we do text a lot.

Chelsea:  Okay. She described it as a generational pattern of back-breaking push through work ethic. And, she said that to me. Again, this woman knows nothing about me or my family. And, I was just like, “Well, that’s accurate.” Because thinking about my parents are very hard workers, my grandparents on both sides are very hard workers, my family is very much like, “I’m going to get this on my dad especially.” It’s like I’m putting my head down. I’m going to fucking do it. That’s kind of the culture that I’ve grown up in. And, not that my family just works all the time, they definitely are good about taking breaks and all that stuff. But, as soon as she said that, I was like, “This makes complete sense to me.” And, I literally almost kind of started crying, the laugh-crying tears because I was like, “A fucking course. It’s a generational thing.” Of course, it is.

And so, it was just so interesting to have someone that doesn’t know me at all tell me that that’s something that I have a pattern in and something that my entire going back generations. I even asked her. I was like, “Is it more paternal or maternal?” And, she’s like all I’m seeing and she kind of drew this big ass triangle with her hands. It just starts with you and just goes out. And, I was like, “Okay, cool.” So, that just kind of told me how ingrained that pattern was and it’s something that I know I experience a lot in my daily life of that kind of, “Oh, I have to do more. I have to do more, I have to do more.” I’ve done a lot of mindset work on trying to switch that thought to my worth is not attached to how much I do. And–

Cassie:  It’s a big one.

Chelsea:  Yeah. And, it’s been kind of fun as Cassie and I, this business that we’ve been creating has kind of grown and we’re realizing that it might be nice to have other people help us do certain things. As we’re recording, we’re in the process of looking to hire some help, some part-time help just to kind of do a few things for us so we can focus on what we really want to do to help this business grow, this podcast grow.

Cassie:  Because we’re guilty of doing all the things. We’ll just do all the things. 

Chelsea:  Mm-hmm. And so, what’s interesting is kind of that–

Cassie:  And, work 16 hours.

Chelsea:  Yes, it’s like “How many hours can I work?” And, I totally get that there are sometimes there’s seasons where you have to maybe put in a little bit more effort, but being really aware that that’s a season, it should be a short-term period of time, not a long-term pattern. I think that that’s hard because if you kind of look at society especially American culture, I think Americans are the worst at this. I think other countries look at us and they’re like, “You work how many hours a week?” Working 80 hours a week in America I feel it’s a badge of honor that we like, “I work 80 hours a week.” And like, “Good, good fucking congratulations. What else do you do with your life? Your muscles work all the time 24/7, seven days a week, and never take a day off.” But, in other countries, I feel they much more prioritize taking time for yourself, taking time to be with family, to be with friends, to relax, and just to be and not try to just do more and do more, and accomplish more, and measure worth that way.

And so, I think it’s really wearing on anyone and everyone. But, I think when you are living in that culture and you have a chronic illness, it just makes it harder. And, maybe Cassie, you kind of can speak a little bit more. But, I know there was a time back in recording this kind of the end of August, back in July. And, I talked about this on the 21-day, Mastering Energy Management series that we did, but I burned myself be fucked out. It was bad. There was about a week towards the middle of July where I was so tired that I literally had to just like I couldn’t do anything. And, I had a moment because so many times that we talked to people about their chronic illness stories of what kind of triggered it, and stressful situations, all these things. I had a moment of like, “Holy crap, did I finally push myself too far? Did I finally push myself over the cliff? And, is this the beginning of something really not good?” Not that being diagnosed with a chronic illness is the worst thing that can happen to you. It’s a challenge but it would not be the end of the world.

Cassie:  No, it’s okay. Lately, I’m really feeling something about this toxic positivity. I think it’s also okay to say one would be scared to get a diagnosis and it sucks to get one. And, there’s a grieving process that goes with it. So, I think it’s totally fair and a no-judgment thing for you to be like, “Oh, fuck, did I do this? What’s going to happen now? Have I just pushed myself too far?” I mean particularly when you’re spending a lot of your life talking to people who are like, “Hey, I pushed myself too far” and then “Oh, shit, I have Hashimoto’s” or something.

Chelsea:  And, I have lots of moments like reading. We talk about this all the time, Sarah’s book. Reading that I was like, “Holy shit, I could be one traumatic experience away from living this exact same life.”

Cassie:  Yeah.

Chelsea:  And so, it is something that’s scary to think about since I do hear so many stories and it’s not the end of the world, but I mean it is scary. And so, I was a little worried for a little bit. Because I was forced to, it took time to relax, I rested, and I felt better. But, I was in a funk for a solid a month and a half where I didn’t want to do anything, I was kind of going through the emotions, I felt really overwhelmed, I didn’t really want to talk to anyone, I just was kind of meh.

And, I think it was a combination of a lot of stuff going on at once plus the fact that it had been four or five months or however many, to what is time anymore. But, it had been quite a bit of time since COVID had really escalated. And, I don’t think that I had really given enough credit to the low to moderate, the high level of stress that I was experiencing in a daily basis because of that for various reasons just with uncertainty, not knowing if in a month our studio will get shut down again, I’ll be teaching in my office, which I really don’t want to do but will if I have to.

So, I think a lot of that built up with everything that was going on in my life. And, I was also, I think, unfortunate because at the same time my fiancé was really, really stressed. And so, normally one of us is stressed and then the other one is not so we can lean on each other and we can help. But, when we were both stressed, we couldn’t help each other. And so, it was a fight, but I don’t want to say it was a fight at each other because in the end we actually weren’t mad at each other, we were just taking out our frustrations and anger on life on each other. And so, then that was just kind of another kink in the world.

And then finally, I was able to actually take a break, and I set boundaries, and I did what I needed to for me, which looked a lot of reading by myself. And, I once again reminded myself that even though I’m very extroverted for what I do in my life at my core, I’m an introvert. And, maybe some of you listening will kind of resonate with that.

So, growing up, I was very introverted, I was very shy, I was very quiet, but then because I’m a fitness instructor and a Pilates instructor and I show my life on the internet and on podcasts, I show up very extroverted a lot. And so, I was like, “Well, maybe I’m just an extrovert now. This is fun. I’m an extrovert.” And then, I was like no, the thing that recharges me the most is sitting by myself reading a book.

Pardon the interruption, but Cassie and I want to make sure that you know about this amazing resource that we are so excited to be able to offer you guys. We put our heads together and Cassie and I created our Mastering Energy Management workbook. It is a 21-day workbook designed to get you in touch with your energy, what you really want in your life, and then give you tools to actually make that freakin’ happen. Cassie and I have gone through this process ourselves multiple times. And, each time we learn something new and we get a little bit more in touch with ourselves and our energy levels.

You can find our workbook on Amazon for either a Kindle copy or a paperback copy. And, the link will be in the show notes.

We also have 21 days of podcasts going through each day of the workbook. So, if you want to get an idea of what we’re talking about, make sure to check those out on our podcast.

Now, back to the show.

Cassie:  Yeah, I’m glad that you brought that up. What recharges you is what it’s about. And, when you’re sorting out extrovertedness or introvertedness, it is about what recharges you. And, with grind culture and especially being an instructor, I totally know how that goes because I’ve always been an extrovert, and everyone’s always like “You’re super extroverted and so outgoing.” And, sometimes I am recharged by other people and teaching especially like there’s times that it freaking pumps you up and it gives you all the energy to keep going.

Chelsea:  And you’re like, “I can do anything.”

Cassie:  I can do anything and it’s–

Chelsea:  Life is amazing.

Cassie:  Totally. And, it’s amazing. But, also in my core, the things that really do recharge me though are being on my own and I am more introverted in that sense. I kind of go both ways.

You know what’s funny, I actually remember listening to a podcast episode from Chalene Johnson. What’s her podcast called?

Chelsea:  Okay, she has two.

Cassie:  “The Chalene Show.”

Chelsea:  “The Chelene Show” and then she’s got “Build Your Tribe.”

Cassie:  Oh, yeah. Okay, so–

Chelsea:  Now, I kind of think she needs to change the name.

Cassie:  Yeah, probably. Okay. So, “The Chalene Show” I think is the one that I was listening to. Oh my god, this would have been summer 2016. And, I was painting houses at that time to fund my Pilates training. And, I was painting exterior houses and I particularly remember having to scrape off the old white paint on a garage, and then I was going to repaint it, whatever. But, the thing I loved about it was listening to books on tapes and podcasts.

And, I particularly remember her talking about an introverted extrovert, an extroverted introvert.

Chelsea:  I’m pretty sure I listened to the same episode because I listen to “The Chalene Show” in about that same time.

Cassie:  Yeah, dude. And, I was like, “Oh, my god, is this a thing?” You can actually be both. And, that was the first I’d heard from it or heard about it. So, for those listening, that’s a thing. You can be an extroverted introvert which sounds like what you are, Chelsea, or an introverted extrovert which maybe what I am.

Chelsea:  Yeah.

Cassie:  No, maybe I’m also more like you. I don’t know. And so, for those listening, don’t define yourself totally in a box. It’s okay to do both. So, yes, Chelsea continues.

Chelsea:  But, basically I mean the world is go, go, go, do all the things. There’s definitely been times that I’ve told people everything I’m doing and they’re like “Oh, my gosh, you’re so busy. You’re doing so many things. That’s so cool.” And, I do cool things but sometimes it feels like they were saying that what I was doing was cool because I was doing so many things not because of what they actually were. And so, I kind of thinking about not putting being busy on a pedestal.

And, I am completely guilty of what I’m about to say next. The number one excuse I hear for kind of anything is I’m just so busy. Well, new slash world. Everyone is fucking busy in their own way. Everyone, I don’t care if you’ll only work an hour a day, you’re busy in some way. You’ve got something else to do. Stay-at-home moms are incredibly busy people. Even if their kids are at school or at daycare, they’re still busy. Everyone is busy.

Cassie:  We all have shit going on, man.

Chelsea:  Yeah. Again, this is the thing I’m guilty of is I’ve definitely when someone was like, “Oh I’m busy,” I’m like, “You’re busy?” Let me tell you as I try to one-up them. I really, really don’t try to do this anymore. I try to communicate if someone’s needing something from me and I’m not able to give that to them I’m like, “Look, I know you think that this thing that we’re talking about right now is the only thing that I do in my life but it’s not, so I can’t give you what you need at this second, I could give it to you down the road or I can’t at all.” I’m trying to kind of make that not like “I’m so busy I can’t do that,” it’s just that’s not in the realm of possibility right now. Yeah, I don’t know where I was going with that. I lost my train of thought.

But, anyways, there’s–

Cassie:  Maybe about just dropping the judgment. And, this is actually really pertinent to chronic illness also is the fact that grind culture and defining your worth by productivity. You’re right especially in the United States, there is a huge thing about you should be getting up at 05:00 am, get your workout in, be at work by 08:00 am, having done a workout, done your morning mindset work, and made yourself a healthy breakfast and also freshly squeezed yourself a green juice, and then grab your Starbucks on the way in to your 08:00 am job, then work all day. And then at 05:00 pm, then–

Chelsea:  And, not take a lunch break–

Cassie:  No lunch break. No, no, no, no. Yeah.

Chelsea:  I’m sorry you all, if you were getting paid to take a damn lunch break as someone who gets paid hourly and doesn’t have built-in time off, please for the love of all things, take your time off.

Cassie:  Oh, my god, seriously.

Chelsea:  Do it.

Cassie:  Okay. And then, let’s not even get into the fact that smokers get 15 minutes all the time for a break for their freaking smoke break and nonsmokers don’t get that extra break. Anyway, then it’s evening rolls around 05:00 pm, and then you’re going to get off work and take your kids to soccer practice magically have a delicious healthy nutritious meal on the table. And, everybody’s clothes are obviously also laundered because you’ve done that during the day at some point.

Chelsea:  And, the house is spotless. There’s no–

Cassie:  The house looks really good.

Chelsea:  There’s no dust anywhere.

Cassie:  Yes. And, don’t forget it’s Thursday night, so obviously, you have your girls’ night, so you’re fitting in wine with the girls after dinner let’s say. And then, it’s really important that you do some self-care and take care of yourself. So, after that, you’re going to also fit in meditation for yourself, a bath.

Chelsea:  I was going to say a bath too.

Cassie:  A bath because you have to be clean. And, magically you’re doing a really good job because you’re going to be either in bed by 10:00 or it’s grind culture, you can get those couple emails in at night that you haven’t done. And, let’s say that also you’re running your side biz. And so, you’ve got your social media work and it’s midnight that you know what, you did all the things. And, five hours of sleep is fine because you’ll sleep when you’re dead.

And, let’s just all say that we know that you’re out there, people, okay because Chelsea’s done it, I’ve done it.

Chelsea:  I’ve definitely done it.

Cassie:  We both lived these lives doing it where it’s like “Yeah, hell, yeah, I only needed five hours of sleep last night and looked at all the things I accomplished and did.” And, that’s not to say also that sometimes it feels really good to be productive and do all the things and then you’re like, “Look at me go, I am so productive today and it feels great.” No shame in that. Anyway, there’s those people. This is going back to your train of thought that you lost that I’m picking up for you now apparently.

Chelsea:  Thank you.

Cassie:  But, there’s those people and then there’s also the people that, yeah, you have one or two hours of things to do that day. Maybe all you have to get done is the laundry. Maybe all you have to do is take the kids to school and go home. Or, you’re running a little bit of a side business, you’re working part-time, you are a stay-at-home wife, or you’re a stay-at-home mom, or whatever it might be that you don’t have all of those things going on. You’re right, you’re still busy. We all have stuff going on. Maybe you are an ear on the phone to multiple people in your life who needs you there. Maybe you’re actually taking care of your neighbor and doing their grocery shopping for them right now. Maybe you’re freaking dog sitting and that’s actually taking more energy than you realized it was going to be taking. Whatever it is, we all have stuff going on, we’re all busy.

And, I remember in a talk you gave, and I think you said it on this podcast, Chelsea, it’s like “We all have the same hours in the day as Beyonce.” How are you going to spend them?

Chelsea:  Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Cassie:  Yeah. And, that was super interesting because it’s like, “Okay, wait, that’s so true.” Everyone else in the world has the same hours that we have, and it is about choosing how you want to spend your time. And, when you are making those choices and decisions, don’t define your worth by how much shit you’re squeezing into your day. Ooh! And, I also think that that’s important to say that how many things you’re squeezing into your day also does not define productivity.

Chelsea:  No, no.

Cassie:  Okay. Is that maybe where your thought was going? I hope so.

Chelsea:  I think that’s where I was going. And, one thing, I love that you brought up that Beyonce quote because to me the context of you have the same hours in a day as Beyonce does is Beyonce is really successful badass woman, so it’s like “Oh, I have the same hours of my day, I should be able to do just as much as she does to get me there.” And so, also thinking about that context of just because there’s 24 hours in a day doesn’t mean you need to fill 24 hours of them.

Cassie:  Also she’s got a team of rockstars–

Chelsea:  God, damn it. Yes. Can we please talk about that for a second?

Cassie:  Yeah.

Chelsea:  Teams. I think we talked about it on another episode but ask for fucking help.

Cassie:  Yeah.

Chelsea:  Don’t let people guilt you into it.

Cassie:  It takes a village–

Chelsea:  You ask for help. Ask for help. There are so many times that Cassie and I are working on something. Actually, I did this to you last weekend, Cassie, is I’ve been working on a project for our membership site, mywellnesshub.co. For those of you that don’t know what it is, go check it out. Anyways, little mini ad over.

I’ve been working on something, but I had promised my fiancé that we were going to make macaroons. We were going to have time together, we were going to put that. I was putting work aside, we were spending time on Sunday doing something we wanted to do together. And so, I was like, “Alright, Cass, I got it to here, is there any way you can finish this last little bit for me?”

Cassie:  Yeah.

Chelsea:  And you’re like, “Yes, of course, I’m working on some stuff, now it’s perfect, I can easily get that done.” So, of course, there was a part of me that was like, “Chelsea, just get it done, spend another 30 minutes on it, it’ll be fine.” But, I was like no, I worked a certain amount, it’s okay to ask for help. And, it would have also been okay if Cassie has been like, “No, I can’t do that right now.” That would have been okay too and then I would have could have made the decision of just waiting for another day or getting it done and moving on.

So, ask for help. The people that appear they’re doing all the things, they have a help. The houses that you walk into that are completely fucking spotless, they have a cleaner, I promise you. I promise you.

Cassie:  Or they’re Monica from friends.

Chelsea:  Yeah. They have kids that have chores that do it.

Cassie:  Yes, we have children so that we have slaves. But, anyway really quickly also on to that. Oh, shit, I hope I’m not losing my train of thought now too. Damn it. It happened. I felt it going away.

Chelsea:  Just do it. It’s okay.

Cassie:  It was really important.

Chelsea:  Well, if you think of it, you can just record a little thing later and just–

Cassie:  What did you just talk about? What were you just saying?

Chelsea:  It’s all about cleaning.

Cassie:  Right before that.

Chelsea:  I don’t remember.

Cassie:  Fuck.

Chelsea:  I can’t remember. You all listening probably think we’re crazy, but we’re just having a very fun passionate conversation. Anyway–

Cassie:  That’s really funny, literally neither of us can’t remember what we were talking about a few minutes ago. Oh, I remember. Okay. So, what I was just going to say about asking for help is one thing that really helped me about asking for help was to remember that I like to help.

Chelsea:  Yeah.

Cassie:  Okay, my mother-in-law texted me a couple weeks ago, she just moved back to Wichita, my ex-mother-in-law. She’ll always be my mother-in-law though. But, she was like, “Hey, I made a bunch of cookies, chocolate chip cookies, can I come and bring some to you? I made extra or whatever.” And, I was like, “Yes. Are they your famous chocolate chip cookies that I love and always eat a million of? Please do bring them to us.” And, she would. And, normally one would always be like “Oh, that’s okay. I don’t want you to drive all the way out here. Thanks.” “No, it’s fine.” “I’ll get it from you another time,” or whatever.

Chelsea:  She made them because she wanted to give them to you.

Cassie:  Exactly. And, she wanted to drive them out here to my house to deliver them. And, let me tell you, she gave us 10 or something. And, Chandin and I each ate four and gave myself that two. And, we ate them all within 20 minutes of her delivering them. And so, anyway, that’s just a little example of that would be me where if I made cookies, I want to experience the joy of delivering those cookies to those who love them. I want to drop them off. It makes me feel good. So, obviously, my mother-in-law is the same way, and it makes her feel good. And so, except the cookies. I was like, “Yes, give them. Yum.”

And so, just remember that when you are thinking of maybe needing to ask for help is how much you probably like to help actually. Because most of us and I’m sure the people that are listening to our podcast are kind of like us in that sense with the community that we like to do nice things for each other. And so, that was something that really helped me. If it were me, would I want someone to honestly tell me that they needed my help so I could go over and actually give it to them? Yes. The answer is yes.

Okay, that’s what I was thinking about when we both lost our train of thought.

Chelsea:  Apparently both of us are having trouble thinking straight. We probably should wrap this up.

Cassie:  Yeah.

Chelsea:  But, anyways, everyone, we understand that we live in a society particularly if you were listening to this in the states, we know that there are some international listeners, you know who you are. We love you. We thank you. You’re the best. But, here in the states, we have–

Cassie:  Shout out to Sweden right now.

Chelsea:  Yes. But, here in the states, we have this very much go, go, go, do all the things, being busy on a pedestal type culture, which I’m kind of hoping is shifting a little bit with everyone having to slow down a little bit more because of COVID. But, just know that it’s not good to do that even if you do not have an illness as hopefully, you all heard from my story of just not having a good time for a very long period of time and struggling for a while. But then, knowing that you as yourself, if you have limited energy, honor the energy you have, honor what you can really do, and then ask for help, set boundaries, and don’t feel that you need to fall into that pattern that the rest of the world around you or the country around you is kind of falling into. It’s okay to take rest. Be that example of I know my limits, I know what I really want to do in my life, and I’m going to set a boundary, I’m not going to go past that.

So, that’s kind of our little rant on doing all the things and kind of some of our experiences with it. We would love to hear your thoughts on this episode, send us a message on Instagram, @therealspooniesunite. You can send us an email, hello@therealspooniesunite.com if that’s kind of more your style. Otherwise, thank you for listening. You’re the best. We love you all.

Cassie:  We do.

Chelsea:  We’ll be back in your ears soon with our next episode.

Cassie:  Yeah, yeah.

We hope you enjoyed today’s episode. Please write us a review to help us reach more people like you.

Chelsea:  If you’d like to connect with Cassie and I, you can find us on Instagram, @therealspooniesunite. 

ou can also join our private Facebook community, Spoonies Unite, or you can visit our website, therealspooniesunite.com for all sorts of resources and to stay up-to-date with our current projects. And, don’t worry, you can find all these links in the show notes below.

Cassie:  Thank you to our wonderful spoonie patrons for all your support. And, you can become one too. That’s right. All you have to do is go on over to patreon.com/therealspooniesunite and you can get all sorts of extra goodies like videos of our episodes and more.

Chelsea:  Any support is greatly appreciated. It helps enable us to create more content for all of you as well as make this podcast sound better and better. 

Thanks for listening. We can’t wait to be back in your ears soon.